How To Keep Sex Hot Within A Marriage

You can burn down the house long after the honeymoon passion has cooled.

If the truth be known, most married people would just as soon stay married. They’d love to keep having hot sex with their spouses, and for as long as possible. They’d love to avoid tumbling into some tawdry affair, with all its messy and humiliating consequences.

It’s not just AIDS and the fact that we’re usually too busy or exhausted to attempt the extra-marital hunt. It’s that, deep down; we’re basically nice, loving, responsible human beings.

Who would like to get a little more?

So that’s the subject of this story: how nice men and women can keep married sex hot for the long haul.

But first, one-word bit of advice about the whole subject: Relax. There’s no reason to doubt your manhood or your femininity, or your love for your lover, if seeing her or him naked doesn’t arouse you as quickly or as wildly as it once did. It’s worrisome, sure. It stirs up all kinds of dark self-doubts. But in a long-term relationship, it’s completely natural and predictable to experience a gradual downshift in your sexual responses, and it helps just to know and accept this. You’re certainly not alone. (If it’s any consolation, there are several thousand other men and women reading this story).

Following are suggestions from the top sex therapists on how to prime yourself for long-life passion:

SHAKE IT UP

There’s a lot of talk nowadays about safe sex, but maybe sex (at least once the protection is in place) isn’t supposed to be ‘safe’. Maybe it’s supposed to be one big wild desperate adrenal rush with stuff getting knocked over and things busting apart at the seams – a few breathless moments stolen from death. Maybe that’s why married sex – at least the mechanical kind that we sometimes settle for – often seems hardly worth the trouble. Boredom is death to life, and death to sex.

As a result, sex therapists stress the importance of breaking out of boring sexual routines. Alter the pace. Try going much faster, or much slower, than you usually go. And remember, good sex doesn’t always have to be lingeringly slow.

Try some sessions of non-intercourse sex, when foreplay is the main course, not just the appetizer.

Or try some sessions where only one person gets all the goodies. Do it one time just for her/him. Then, other time, she’ll (or he’ll) do it all for you.

If you’re always the aggressor, try letting yourself be seduced. And sometimes both can be aggressors. The only limit is your imagination.

TRY ALL-DAY FOREPLAY

“Always remember that good sex begins while your clothes are still on,” say William Masters, M.D. and Virginia Johnson, the grand-dad and -ma of sex study. Getting in the mood is not just the few moments before sex; it can go on for hours, or days, beforehand. Since good sex is just one aspect of a good relationship, it can grow naturally out of the time you spend together.

“The best sex times we ever have usually happen after hours and hours of talking,” says one young businessman who’s been married five years. “Sometimes, usually it’s Saturday, we’re talking all day long. The whole day becomes a prelude to bed. If we take the time to reconnect, to really say ‘hello’ again, after the madness of the work week, things often get very special after we turn out the lights.”

RE-POSITION

Address your mate from a new angle. For ideas, take a look at those classic how-to love manuals, Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana or The Perfumed Garden, an ancient test that describes something in excess of 200 positions. Tell the lady at the bookstore it’s for your kid’s school paper.

RE-LOCATE

Sleep specialists tell insomniacs never to read or watch TV or do anything else in bed except sleep. Eventually the bed becomes powerfully associated with the sensation of falling asleep. Beds can also become powerfully associated with boring, predictable sex. So try getting out of the bedroom. Many people have fantasies of making love on the living room sofa but don’t do it. It takes a little effort, but it’s worth it.

Think of yourself as a Hollywood location scout, looking over your whole house for promising stage sets. Consider the kitchen, for instance, Kitchens are full of interesting things (Remember Jack Nicholson and Jessica Lange on the kitchen table in The Postman Always Rings Twice?) Try the balcony when the stars are just coming out at night. Or your Car. Or a caravan got on hire.

RE-SCHEDULE

Therapists often recommend setting aside some time to be together, when you’re not stressed out, exhausted or trying to do two other things at once (Yes, make a date with your spouse!) Arrange to have dinner together once a month, for example. Observe Masters and Johnson: “If you don’t spend much quality time with your partner outside the bedroom, it’s hard to create a sense of closeness and affection the instant you’re ready for sex.”

VISIT VICTORIA

Okay, sure – sexy lingerie isn’t exactly an original idea. But it works. Black lace panties and those little French maid whatchamacallits with the straps have this amazing way of enhancing one’s sexual appetite. Ditto for incendiary male shorts or briefs.

WARM UP THE TV SCREEN

There are certain kinds of videos that can’t be watched in the company of a woman without taking a brief, sweet intermission, which may help account for the fact that a good percentage of video rentals now are erotic films.

But watch it: many women are turned off by hardcore films; you might be better off trying something softer.

Also, remember that you’re using erotic films only to increase your arousal. It’s a huge error to judge your sexual performance, against the ‘stars’ of these films. Most women, confronted by someone like Harry Reems, would call the police. And film editors splice multiple sex acts to make them look like one continuous, marathon performance, which in reality would kill even the guy in the movie.

ASK AND YOU’LL PROBABLY RECEIVE

The most sexually satisfied women are those who’re the most open with their partners about their sexual fantasies, intimate sexual feelings and desires. It’s safe to conclude that you’re much more likely to get what you want if you simply learn to ask for it.

Sounds easy enough, but most of us don’t do it. Say Masters and Johnson, “One of the most amazing things to us about sexual behaviour is how reticent most people are to talk with their lovers about sex… We see plenty of couples whose well-intentioned caresses fall short of the mark because they’re too much, too soon, too little, too light-handed, too far off the mark.”

Many sex marriage counsellors observe a failure to communicate among couples they counsel. Very often, they discover that each partner has desires he or she has never brought up. Whatever your fantasy, it’s probably not as strange as you think.

How to ask? One expert recommends mentally rehearsing your lines before the big moment to keep stuttering, blushing and mumbling to a minimum. But maybe you should just relax and do it.

Most couples are very open to the idea of trying to make their love lives better. If you just approach your spouse in a nice, loving way – say, “I love our sex life, but I’d like us to try some new ways to keep it interesting” – you’ll probably find your partner may well have some ideas of her/his own.

KEEP UP APPEARANCES

One of the real keys to a satisfying long-lasting sex life is taking pride in yourself, keeping yourself up. Take your physical self seriously; don’t let yourself get sloppy. You notice when your mate lets himself/herself go, puts on weight, pads around in a bathrobe all day. It works the other way, too.

FOCUS ON THE GAME, NOT THE SCORE

There’s something peculiarly male about the idea of focusing single-mindedly on one single goal – orgasm – and then driving straight for it, as though driving to a job. So, this bit of advice is for the men: Sex is a form of adult play, a willingness to take time to enjoy things, to go slow or fast, to try something new. Maybe we’d enjoy the game a lot more if we weren’t so focused on the score. And maybe it would last a lot longer.

Pornography As a Turn-On for Fun-Driven Adult Sex

Adventurous couples can buy a pornographic video and watch it together. That is generally a surefire way to end up in bed. In fact, it is usually when couples are in bed that they watch such films. And if the film is a good one they will enjoy being turned on as they watch it. Many couples find that the provocative content stimulates them to duplicate what is being viewed. They are impulsively driven to touch each other, kid around, mimic the sex acts, and swing from the imagined chandelier as they tickle each other’s fancy.

In many countries in the world, including most industrialized ones, pornography is not banned or hidden from view. For example, at King’s Cross district in Sydney, Australia a section of the city is designated to show and sell pornography Sex oriented videos, DVDs, books, sex toys, lubricants, assumed aphrodisiacs, are sold in kiosks and stores. Strip clubs, restaurants, massage parlors and other clubs are available to meet members of the opposite sex.

In Europe, in many countries, and cities pornography is not hidden and thus available for adults. In all the countries there are restrictions to the sale of pornography to children and prosecution of offenders is open and continuous.

In the US pornography is not banned from sale to adults although there is no tolerance on anyone abusing the Child Pornography laws.

But for the purpose of improving the sex life of adults pornography has a place for some. Do you have to be lonely or hard-up to use porn? The answer is No. Porn can be a substitute for sex for many lonely and sex starved adults, mainly men, and for adults without a partner who like visual stimulation for self-arousal.

Finally, let’s examine whether pornography can fit into the armamentarium of the average adult who wishes for increased stimulation for lovemaking. What can porno offer?
As with any movie there is added stimulation by watching real pictures compared to imaging such scenes. Some porno videos actually tell a reasonable story where there is more than just sexual exploitation. So some selection is necessary. Google is a good resource to discover what are considered the best sex videos made in the past few decades.

Beside adding visual stimulation couples can mimic what they see, learn about new positions, empathize with the excitement of the sex partners, imagine participating in the viewed sex, experience sex beyond their own interests, such as gay, bi, S and M, bondage, oral and anal sex, and the use of fetishes. Some show dancing, foreplay that could be stimulating and perhaps above all can act as a stimulus to open the viewers to become freer and lustier about sex.

If you attempt to try out the benefits of sex videos and it is new to you imagine becoming an adventurer and explorer so you don’t take a negative bias into your viewing. An open mind will allow you to gain what might be there for you. At the very worst it won’t have any effect on you and may even turn you off. If so, just chalk it up as another interesting experience.

To determine if pornography may be a stimulus for your personal sex life approach its use openly. It might be a new vehicle for greater enjoyment of sex for occasional use or even frequent use. Remember adults have no restrictions on what they mutually do and prefer behind closed doors. So enjoy the movies and enjoy the sex and know you have taken another step to gaining a new stimulus for sex and love.

by Marvin H. Berenson, M.D. July 12, 2011

To discover new and effective ways to have a wonderful, romantic love life and to become a great lover, my book “Love and Sex” offers frank and wide-reaching information. You will find a truly in-depth look at what actually happens during sex and how to overcome sexual difficulties. By reading this book you can change your love life.

100% Free Adult Amateur Films

The free adult porn market is pretty much thriving these days and more and more sites pop-up in this industry every day. The vids which they host are virtually mind-blowing and folks like them. On every single free porn page can be found a specific number of categories that will help you look for the vids that you like the most.

The grouping that in some way seems to turn me on is the Amateur. Amateur 100% free porn vids are simply astounding – there are no words and phrases in any way to explain a home made video with you and your girl making love in the craziest way possible. I absolutely am into these clips and i confess that I check out them once in a while. From them fresh approaches can be mastered for pleasing your lover better. All of these 20min clips can actually be considered as being educational vids from where you are able to understand how to do it much better, how to protect yourself and what things you mustn’t do during intercourse.

Almost all free porn amateur vids possess a little something exclusive that makes them one of the most wished-for. Looking at how unprofessional folks start kissing, touching, undressing, looking at them how they’re making real love – this stuff can’t be found in not one other free porn category and i also consider that amateur vids are worthy of the 1st place in any cost-free adult porn category countdown.

What I enjoy the most about free porn amateur vids would be the approach they’re done: through the help of a cellphone or a digicam or even using the webcam of the Personal computer or laptop computer. What I enjoy a lot more is the fact that all those people who have sex on the camera post their video on the internet, on specialized free porn webpages which host this kind of clips and can earn some cash from it… very cool! Try out such a vid on your own and hit me up – inform me what you think of it and from a scale from 1 to 10, just how great the amateur category is.

Adult Videos – Five Things to Look For to Make Her Have a Great Orgasm!

Whenever you look at an adult or porno video look for five things in order to give herthe best orgasm ever! There’s too many that are just totally fake.

1. If the movie has too much sound and it dominates everything else then be sure that it is fake. Many times the producers add the sound track from canned noise they can purchase. If the actor’s mouth is open the whole film do you think that’s realistic? Even the “amateur” films are totally false these days.

2. If the film follows the old “cable tv sex” formula or format, of kissing the girl, fumbling with her breast, going down on her or swallowing him, and then they try five positions and then explode–pass on it. There’s much more to it than that. Several famous directors have said they’d love to make an mature film, if it didn’t cost them their career. They thought most films in this were really horrible. I totally agree. I can deal with no plot, amaterur acting, but at least give us some serious sex.

3. If the film starts with couples in the middle of having sex then you have lost the whole foreplay. Foreplay and imagination are what really makes the lovemaking worthwhile. Sometimes you’ll even see the same scenes again and again, repeated, in different parts of the movie. Tnat’s cheating!

4. If it doesn’t give much anticipation (remember the old song) then they’re losing 50% of the satisfaction you could have. For example, most Hollywood movies take a long time in having the lead actor look at the woman’s body and thinking how to approach her. That’s what we do in real life. In most of these mature films, the actors just go right to it with no introduction, no foreplay, and little anticipation.

I’ve seen a few good films where the actor was watching the woman through her bedroom window undressing, slowly – a piece at a time. Most mature films don’t show that anymore.

5. Finally, if the film doesn’t show the guy getting the woman off with more than one type of orgasm, then why even watch it? Women have at least 7 types of orgasms. Watching a fake guy get a fake woman off with one type of orgasm in different positions gets boring.

Watching Adult Sex Videos Together – Movies Make Magic

Although they still have a stigma for many people, watching adult sex videos with your spouse can be a really great way to improve your marriage sex. Available in as many different varieties as there are types of people in the world, you can watch everything from very basic, “soft porn” as it is called to more graphic and experimental types of adult films. Sensual and erotic imagery is both visually and mentally arousing and may even plant an idea or two in your minds for what you would like to try with one another. Rather than being something that only single men watch in the dark, by themselves, while they masturbate, adult films are actually a really effective type of foreplay for many married couples.

Many couples may secretly want to watch an adult film together, but are hesitant because they are afraid to suggest it to their mate. For some women, there is a fear that their husband will find the women on film more attractive than they find them. For some men, there is concern that their wives may be turned off or find fault with their arousal. The reality is that watching adult films together can be a real bonding experience. It may take several tries to find a particular genre of adult film that works for you both, but in most cases, just the simple act of being “naughty” and watching other people getting physical is enough to start something fun for the married couple watching.

If you and your spouse have decided to watch an adult sex video together, then you should discuss what kinds of films are “OK” and which ones are “off limits”. For instance, your spouse may be uncomfortable watching a film that depicts more than one partner at a time. The object of watching an adult sex video together is to get one another turned on, not turned off, so be sensitive to one another’s preferences. One of the benefits of watching a sex video together is that you may get ideas for positions to try out. Also, having the noise in the background may also help lower your spouse’s inhibitions when it comes to expressing their pleasure vocally.

If you are looking for an easy way to improve your marriage sex life, watching adult sex videos together is a great way to start. Sit back, relax, pop in a video and let nature take its course. You may find that you are having the hottest sex of your marriage, in no time flat!

The Reasons You Should Date Online Through Online Dating Sites

If getting a date is easy for many people, there is no reason why it should be difficult for others. The reason getting a date is difficult for some is just because they don’t know how to go about it. People also date for different reasons and the reasons are best known to the parties involved. Dating is almost inevitable and this shows that dating is part of life because we all enjoy sharing time with our soul mates. If we all enjoy sharing time with our soul mates, it means the importance of sharing of time with someone we love is understood and the online dating sites have been playing a very vital role in this process. Many have not yet put online dating into consideration because they either believe they have no reasons to register with an online dating site or they don’t believe in the effectiveness of these sites. In this article, you will discover the reasons why you should register with an online dating site and date online.

1. Online Dating Sites Offer Wide Variety of Potential Partners.

People have different tastes and because there is wide variety of potential partners to choose from, getting your choice and a perfect match for yourself becomes easier. When you are signing up, you need to give your profile which is the platform on which searches are based. You are advised not to give wrong information about yourself in your profile. Members have competitive profiles and this gives you a better opportunity to pick the best partner for yourself. No one is imposing anyone on you, so you are not in a kind of haste that could make you choose a partner that is contrary to your choice. Online dating sites also have different people from different parts of the world and you can conveniently be successful with your search.

2. Online Dating Sites Are Time and Money Saving.

The time and effort you would have exhausted going a certain distance to look for a partner is saved. The effort that is required to make her see the reasons why she should accept your proposal and date you is also saved if you use online dating sites. Moreover, the money you would have spent to make your partner enjoy the relationship probably by taking her to places like a cinema, party, beach or out for lunch or dinner is saved. You might need to spend to make your partner happy and comfortable, buy wines, snacks, clothes and even jewelries but because you are dating online, you won’t need to do all of these to enjoy your date. It also saves you the signing up fee which means you are getting exposed to wide variety of potential dates for free.

3. You Have The Opportunity to Meet Other Like-Minded Singles.

Online dating sites offer you the opportunity to meet other like-minded singles. When you meet other singles of the same interest, it becomes easy to share ideas and the chance to advise one another on related issues becomes available. It is always very interesting to share thoughts with other singles of the same interest because you have the same thing in common. You can share your strengths and advise one another on your weaknesses. The understanding is always stronger because all of you are exposed to almost the same challenges. Everything you do, any challenge you face and whatever you experience is always better understood by other singles of the same interest.

4. You Can Communicate Effectively With Other Members.

Communication is the life wire of dating and the online dating sites are aware of this. Because the online dating sites know the importance of communication, they have made communication effective so that members can communicate easily and as quick as possible. With the use of their short message service systems, members are able to communicate with one another whenever they want. What makes communication more interesting in online dating is that you can chat with your partner and see each other through a webcam. With the help of effective communication, you can know your partner more from a far distance. When you even place his statements side by side with the way he looks, you can easily arrive at a remarkable conclusion.

5. Online Dating Sites Are Free to Join.

Online dating sites have made it easy for people to become members because you don’t have to pay to sign up. The registration fee can hinder many people from becoming members if they can’t afford it so it is free to everyone. Those of these online dating sites that require you pay to register have even made it affordable so that you don’t pay through your nose. When you are registering, it is not compulsory you give all your details but you are advised to be truthful with the information you are ready to give about yourself.

6. Online Dating Sites Give Rooms for Easy Termination of Relationships.

It is easier to terminate a relationship you established through the online dating sites because you are not seeing your partner physically. Someone that dates his/her partner physically gets tied in the relationship longer than desired. This is because he/she is highly compassionate and won’t be able to meet his/her partner eyeball to eyeball and say he/she is no longer interested in the relationship. This is because he/she won’t be able to bear the physical emotional reactions of his/her partner.

Dating online truly saves you money but does not in any way rule out the importance and influence of giving. Giving goes a long way to get the attention of your partner. It is easier in a case where you don’t have to spend a dime to get any gift of your choice for your partner. How do I mean? There are lots of incredibly awesome free products being given out by companies which you can always get at the blog below. If you were not aware, this is your chance to get your own completely free. You could also get a love test at my blog to check if you and your partner are for each other. Visit and get as many free products as you want right away.

6 Online Dating Tips for Guys That Actually Work

1. Choose the Right Site, Even if You Have to Pay For It

Never choose a dating site because that’s the one everyone else uses. The most popular sites have the most competition, not a good idea if you want to meet someone quickly. There are dozens of dating sites online. There are religious based sites, fetish based sites, sites based on sexual preference, online dating for seniors, there are race-based sites and many more.

Even if you have to pay a monthly fee, consider that fee an investment into your future. If you are lonely now, wouldn’t you pay $20 or less a month if you were told you could meet the woman of your dreams? Of course you would. You probably spend that on leisurely activities right now that don’t bring you near as much pleasure as a dream matchup would bring you.

There are free sites, low paid sites and expensive ones. Don’t just discount a site because it charges and never discount a free site because you think it’s too cheap and saturated. Choose a site based on your preference, your budget and the number of available matches there are in the dating pool. And don’t be afraid to try several at once. The more sites you put profiles on, the more likely you are to find a match.

2. Search Like You’re a Woman To Beat Your Competition

The hardest part about online dating for men is the filling out of the profile. Most men have absolutely no idea how to present themselves in order to maximize their dating chances. To make matters worse, most online dating help for men fails to touch the process of filling out the profile. Most articles and videos online tell men to be honest and let the woman know what you want. If you want to create a profile that gets results, you must study the competition. Who are you up against? This is going to require you to search the online dating site you’re on as if you were a woman.

It is going to feel strange looking through a bunch of guys’ online dating photos, but this is a necessary step if you want the greatest edge.

If you can take what’s working and make it better, you will succeed at online dating faster than any of the other guys in your dating pool. This is one of those free online dating tips that you rarely read online and yet it’s so effective at putting you on top of whatever dating site you choose.

Pay attention to the photos men are using, the language they’re using, their headlines and anything else that stands out. Take plenty of notes and then write your profile. When you have a page full of profile tidbits, headline ideas and other crucial elements, you won’t find yourself staring at a blinking cursor when you’re asked to fill out your About Me, Ideal Date and any other sections you are required to fill out.

In other words, cheat. Online dating for men doesn’t have to be so difficult if you know the easy ways to do things.

3. Be Honest With Your Date and Yourself

One of the biggest complaints most women have about online dating is the fact that men tend to lie. One recent dater recounted a story where she met a man in real life and she said that his age, height and weight were all different than he implied them to be via their online communications.

She said that he was two inches shorter, twenty years older and at least twenty pounds heavier. His response to being caught in a blatant lie, or three of them for that matter? He shrugged, smiled and said, “Everyone lies on the Internet.”

That is not the way to begin any type of relationship. Out of all the online dating tips for guys you will hear in your lifetime, heed this one first and foremost. Be honest about who you are and what your motivations are. Don’t lie about your age, weight, height, job, income or anything else. You will be found out eventually, especially if the date ever progresses to an offline setting.

Creating an online dating profile can cause you to really take a look at yourself. Don’t lie to make yourself feel better or to entice more dates to contact you. It’s not worth it and it will only deter possible matches in the future.

4. Dig Deep to Find Ice-Breakers

This is another bit of online dating advice guys never hear. When a woman fills out an online dating profile, that is all the information she wants you to know about her. The problem for her is, the Internet is vast and probably holds much more information than what she’s offering. In fact, there is probably information online that she’d rather you not know. Use this free online dating tip with caution. You can find out a lot more about your date by Internet-stalking her, so to speak, but you might not be able to erase any bad press you find from your mind. That can be a problem if you end up really liking the person.

If you don’t mind digging up a little dirt on your potential date-to-be, start Googling the person’s name, headline or anything else. People tend to use the same usernames across multiple platforms, headlines and other elements. Some people even put their Facebook profile links on their page. Use any and all information you find to your advantage.

Your goal isn’t to open a file on them or stalk them (looking someone up online is only called cyber stalking), rather it is to gather info that can be used to break the ice with that person.

You are looking for common ground, something that you both can talk and have a conversation about. This should really only be used if you can’t find anything in the person’s profile. These days you might uncover DUI arrest records, mugshots, divorce records and a lot more on Google and the other engines. Be careful what you search for.

5. Be Intriguing, Even if Your Life is Boring

Even if you live in a nondescript house and you work as an accountant, you can still make your life sound exciting. Get creative with it and pretend you’re writing a mystery novel. You don’t have to get too crazy with it, but try to be mysterious, intriguing and try to keep her guessing as to what you do or what you’re into. The more fun you have with it, the more you’ll stand out from other guys on the dating site you’re on and the more success you’ll have overall.

The dating advice guys need the most is the ability to leave the woman guessing. Leave some information for the first date. Nobody says you have to spill the beans in your profile. Leave her guessing, imply more than tell and you’ll get better results.

6. Get on the Phone or Cam Quickly

In the cult film Napoleon Dynamite, the main character’s brother, Kip, meets a girl online and is telling his brother about it across a table at a restaurant. Kip says that they’ve been chatting for two hours every night and, with a nod, says, “I guess it’s getting pretty serious.”

To make a true match with someone, you have to form an emotional connection. It is possible to form an emotional connection via chat. Kip is one example. However, you will build an emotional connection faster and with more impact if you can get the woman on the phone or Skype or other cam-based chat.

Once you form an emotional connect, the rest is fun and games. The endorphins will take over and you’ll be on that love rollercoaster that most people spend most of their lives reminiscing about and chasing. Get the digits or the Skype address and take your chat to the phone or cam for a much faster connection.